So I became a teacher as an adult.
I mean why not? I was going to change how school looked.
Make it different for kids. Fun and exciting!
Think as a kid I knew something was off about school.
I never felt good enough.
Rarely got high grades.
Teachers didn’t seem to like or know me.
Sitting all day was hard.
Was constantly asked to turn around.
Be quiet.
I never quite fit in.
So when I became a teacher I was full of ambition and a plethora of ideas on how to change things.
Received all kinds of degrees: bachelor’s, library science, master’s in reading and curriculum, and more continuing education classes.
Was a school leader, district leader, and team leader (in that order too).
Did many presentations with innovative and instructional ideas to schools and teachers.
Went to numerous conferences all over the US from Texas to Reno and even Toronto, Canada. Always hungry for all the newest and greatest things. I would come back from these experiences pumped to share and excited for kids to have creative ways to learn.
While in my heart I know I did the best I could to give school a different look for kids. My reading classroom had round tables, comfortable seating, and soft lamp lighting. Instead of textbooks, students learned about genre while choosing books at their level and interests.
But it was a constant fight during my 20-year career since the system has been around for hundreds of years, running like a “well-oiled” machine and like this all over the world.
It can’t change.
It’s too big.
Too conditioned.
Too programmed.
A couple of years before I left the toxic environment. The district spent a million dollars on new reading anthologies. (They were big-ass books that I had the custodians hideaway.) I fought so hard against this. It felt like everything I had worked for was going backward. I begged and begged for aides in my room. Many times students just needed to read with someone. It was one of the things that truly helped improve their reading. It was simple. But there never seemed to be money for people and a simple solution.
That was a huge awakening to the fact the system would never change. I decided to leave my teaching career at the end of 2017. I had worked so diligently to make things right for kids that it had exhausted me.
I went on to have a life coaching business for a few years. Not planning to, I ironically coached many teachers and even presented at some schools. While I know I helped many, I was still tied to that system and the exhaustion.
I decided it was time to step away from that and had a huge unlearning about trying to change something that will never change and an even better understanding for hating school as a kid.
How was your school experience?